s k i n n i e l i c i o u s

3 years and all you get is a stupid blog post. You're welcome.

2011-12-27T11:42:00.000-08:00

Hey there :) It's been a while. And I know no one will ever read this blog ever again ever since I abandoned it a few years back, but heck, here's to the good old days.

I've been through a lot these past few years and I accept the way I turned out; definitely different from how I was back then. But I can't help but want to go back. The nostalgia I feel every time I read old blog posts or browse through pictures from way back when, makes me want to cry. Every single time. What is it about those days that I love and miss so much?

I believe it's because back then, I lived. I lived life doing the things I love with the people I love. I skipped school, played around during exam months and didn't study for nuts. Honestly, I wasn't a bad kid even though I did those things. I just prioritized friends over studies. And life was good. Life was fun and lived how I wanted it to and I can honestly say, I look back with no regrets (even though all my exam results were terrible. Stay in school, kids. And do your homework).

What's life if you live it with no heart? Ten years from now, I want to look back and actually miss Perth and Uni the way I miss Kuching and Miri. It's never too late to start living while you're still breathing. And boy, do I want to start.

xoxo (are they still doing this on blogs? lol),

Grace :)

Goodbye :)

2008-04-30T08:02:00.000-07:00

Well I'm leaving in 12 hours. I won't be updating while I'm there though. Sorry :\

This blog is DEAD D:

*sobs* see you all when I get back to Miri. And thanks to Kristine and Sarah for the dedication posts :)

p/s: To the puak: I'll miss you guys loads when I leave :( Ciaoz!

David Cook- Always Be My Baby

2008-04-19T23:21:00.000-07:00

David Cook rocks. Best arrangement for Mariah Carey week :)

Note: If it doesn't appear, click on the invisible box once.

22nd post. Sad.

2008-04-12T07:11:00.000-07:00

I haven't blogged in more than a month. I wonder if anyone still reads this blog :\

Anyways, Sarah's back :) She was supposed to come back on 6th of April, but she came back earlier for the JPA interview ( You'll get it lah, moi. Don't worry :) )

Sarah: Hello?
Me: Hello?
Sarah: Hellooo?
Me: Uhh...
Sarah: You know who is this or not?
Me: Um... Sarah?
Sarah: Yeah HEHEHEHEEHEHE! Look at the phone number!
Me: Ha?
Sarah: The phone number! What am I using to call you?
Me: Um.. house phone- OMG you're back?!
Sarah: (laughs excitedly) Yeah~

Damn her for surprising me like that :P We actually had a sleepover at Cat's house and I invited her to come and surprise Cat and Pol, but she was tired and she had stuff to prepare for the interview that Tuesday. Ah well, we managed to surprise Cat and Pol anyway :) We went to visit the band and stuff (no comment) and went out with Pol, Cat and Wan 3 days in a row. Fuyoh. Damn tired lah after that. But it was worth it. We had lots of fun :) Met up with Lydia on the third day. She's so cantik lah. I want her nose :( We watched Spiderwick. It was er... kinda cute I guess, but the acting was pretty bad. Shortly after that we camwhored and Lydia gave us a massage. She learned the technique from weeks of hairwashing at Michael's salon :D We went to the beach on the second day and soaked our knees in the water. The water was surprisingly super clear. When we were knee-deep in the water, we could still see the sand beneath our feet. Omg. Tanjung is finally oil and muck free :) As we soaked our feet in the clear clear Tanjung waters ( Jordan, dun jealous, ya? :) ), we talked about the past and how we used to have so much fun in a big group, throwing each other into the water, getting soaked from head to toe and laughing till our sides hurt.

I miss my friends :( They're the only ones who can make me laugh at their stupid theories and sarcasm because it's just so ridiculous. They're the only ones who offer hugs when I feel down. They're the only ones who can get me out of my comfort zone, act like an idiot and not care about what other people think. Hopefully by the end of the year, we'd all be together again, all 13 of us, making lame jokes that only we laugh at and singing stupid songs that we made up with our 'creativity'. Ish. Miss you guys :(

Suddenly lost my mood to blog. Ugh. Now I can't wait to go to Inti. The faster the better.

God bless.

ZOMFG I found it :)

2008-03-03T00:01:00.000-08:00

I can't seem to find the lyrics though. Oh well. Enjoy :)

Linky love trail o.O

2008-02-24T04:45:00.000-08:00

This linky love trail rules:-When you got tagged, you have to add your name to people who had done the tag and and let the list grow!

DunnitLimadang.com
RamblingMoo.com
blogginginmypyjamas
StylewithPassion
ChinneeqDora-zooropazoo
BabyshernFarah (me)
Bani gundu
Frankensteina
Diyanazman
Najmyhana ni mo naiLindoshSlebetcepoterh
UmmYdayana
ELLE LIZA~
Scarlet Kiss
Sycosuchitrawoobee
ArcAngelD
Esther
Mandy
My Award-Winning Drama
Simply Grace

First name- Grace
Nickname- Lisa, Twig, Skinny, Tambebeh, etc.
Name you wish you had- Hmm... never really thought about that.
What do people normally mistake your name as- Allysa/Allisa/Allysha.
Birthplace- Limbang General Hospital.
Time of birth- 10 at night, I think.
Single or taken- Single.
Zodiac sign- Cancer.

Your appearance:
How tall are you- 160+ cm.
Wish you were taller? - Nah.
Eye colour- Dark brown.
Eye colour you want- Green ;)
Natural hair colour- Brown-ish black?
Current hair colour- Brown-ish black with copper highlights.
Short or long hair? - Shoulder length.
Ever dye your hair a bizzare colour? - Nope.
Curly, straight, wavy- Um it's straight on the top but when it reaches my shoulders it curls up.
Last time you did something dramatic with your hair- Form 2. Coloured it bright pink and orange. So neon 8D
Glasses or contacts- Contacts. Only wear specs at home.
Do you wear make up- Nope. Only eyeliner, lip gloss and mascara occasionally.
Ever had hair extensions?- Nope.
Paint your nails?- Used to.

In the opposite gender:
What colour eyes- Anything will do :)
What colour hair- Brunette.
Shy or outgoing?- Somewhere in the middle.
Looks or personality- More to personality.
Sexy or cute- Cute.
Serious or fun- Fun. Only serious when needed.
Older or younger than you- Older.
Broke someone's heart- I dunno. Hope not.
Wondered what's wrong with you? - I don't get this question.
Wish you were a prince/ princess- No.
Liked someone who's taken- Nope.
Shaved your head- No.
Been in Love- Probably.
Used chopsticks? - Yeah.
Sang in the mirror to yourself- I don't think so.

Favourites:
Flower - Roses. Deep red roses :)
Candy- Chocolates, I guess.
Song- Loads, but atm I guess 'Motion City Soundtrack- The Future Freaks Me Out'
Scent- I dunno.
Movie- LOTR TRILOGY :D
Singer- Too many. I listen to any genre.
Word- Ha? :D
Junk food- I dunno.
Website- I dunno D:
Lotion- Um... none?
Animals- Really fat cats *hugs*
Ever cried over someone?- Yeah.
Is there anything you wish you could change about yourself? - Yeah. My weight lol.
Do you think you're attractive? - Honestly, no.
If you had to choose a fairytale for your life what would you choose? - Enchanted LAWL. How does she know~
Do you play any sports?- Badminton atm.

The rules:-Link to your tagger and post these rules.

List (8) random facts about yourself and tag (8) people.

- Still runs around the house like a kid. I just did, actually :P
- Likes eating whipped cream right from the can.
- Loves music :)
- A banana.
- Kurus kering.
- Thinks anything furry, pink and glittery should be burned.
- Loves simplicity.
- Is turning 18 this year?

(I don't tag people :) )

Goodbye, sabun phone.

2008-02-17T05:15:00.000-08:00

A picture with the St Joe Kuching boys at Sarawak Plaza. Such a coincidence that we took that picture right in front of the Memory Lane store :)

I've been waking up with band songs in my head again *sigh* Just miss those times so much. I'm an official St Joe Miri Band alumni now *does the alumni pose* Alumni :D I'm still crazy about band like I was when I was a band member and still talk about it just as much. Jordan's really sick of hearing us babble about band already hahaha. Well, sorry! :P Can't help it bah. Forever band members at heart ;)

Oh and my handphone was stolen just this Friday. Left it at GCM by accident at around noon and a bunch of kids stole it a few minutes/hours later. I just blocked the old sim card on Saturday morning so if you received any phone calls from my number from 12:30 pm (Friday) till 12:00pm (Saturday), that wasn't me. I repeat,

THAT WASN'T ME!

I got a new sim card with the same number though so it's safe to message or call. If you received a call from a bunch of guys (I think?), they are NOT my friends. Just the jerks who stole my phone. Pfft. So if you want to call or text me please leave your name because I lost all my contacts. Thank you.

Another sea creature gone :(

2008-02-01T01:11:00.000-08:00

To my dearest mummy whale,

Till this day, I still haven't been able to figure out how you could have conceived me since you know, you're a lesbo whale and Jordan's a reigning gay Sea King. So I've come to accept the possibility that I'm either a lovechild or an adopted daughter. But I love you both all the same teehee :)
So here's the dedication post I promised you. Knowing you ever since the beginning of Form 4 has been a blast for me. I've never known anyone as muka tebal and as loud as you. You have a way with people, being able to start a conversation with anyone you meet and I've always admired that about you. You have the ability to make anyone smile even though you've just had a bad day. I can always rely on you to give me advice or just to listen to my problems. You were one of the ones who really helped me get back on my feet again after what happened last year. Thanks for rooting me on and for telling me to be strong. And especially thanks for all your great big whale hugs. You are the softest chunk of meat that ever walked the earth haha (sounds kinda wrong but oh well). You never fail to make me smile with your crazy sense of humor :) Although you shoot bad words out of your mouth as much as Samo sometimes, you have a heart of gold and you really know how to care for your friends. You don't let people push you or any of your friends around (just found this out recently at the canteen during SPM haha. Remember? :P). I'm really glad to have you as one of my bestest friends ever :) Thanks for always being there for me and for always giving me that extra push whenever I feel lazy. We're all missing you already :( Come back as soon as you can, alright? Luv you always, my fellow sea creature :) Take care and God Bless :)

Twig and Whale...

Prefect times

2008-01-27T00:02:00.000-08:00

Just felt like posting this up :P

No more sarcasm :(

2008-01-12T06:58:00.000-08:00

We just sent Chris off yesterday. Didn't know we were gonna miss him so much :( It's suddenly so quiet nowadays without Belle talking about fashion, Charlene updating us on Korean dramas, Sarah's random shouting and Chris' sarcasm.

To Clezpo: All the best in Ipoh and tell us when you're back in Miri. Or we'll hunt you down ourselves. We know where you live >:)
A work of art :)

Tags.

2008-01-08T01:43:00.000-08:00

Tagged AGAIN by Kristine.

1. Where were you at 3.02am this morning?
- At home, on my bed, sleeping away :)

2. What was the first thing you thought of this morning?
- Something.

3. Is the person you have a crush on older or younger than you?
- No comment.

4. What did you do last night?
- Watched my bro play DotA and watched some tv.

5. What do you hope to do this weekend?
- Hopefully I can finally make up my mind on which college to go to.

6. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now?
- I don't know.

7. What song are you listening too?
- Dashboard Confessionals- Stolen.

8. Have you ever told someone of the opposite sex you loved them?
- Yup.

9. Hows your heart lately?
- It's alright.

10. What were you doing at 7 a.m.?
- Still asleep.

11. What were you doing this afternoon at 12 p.m.?
- Still asleep haha.

12. What was the reason you last cried?
- No comment.

13. What was the last movie you saw in theaters?
- Enchanted. HOW DOES SHE KNOWWWWW~ damn song's still stuck in my head haha.

14. Have you ever driven without a license?
- Not really.

15. Have you ever talked to someone when they were high?
- Pfft. All my friends are high. All the time haha.

16. How many red lights have you ran?
- I don't drive.

17. Have you ever cried while in the shower?
- Well of course.

18. Have you ever, in any way, betrayed by someone you trusted?
- Sort of.

19. When was the last time you were given roses?
- 2006 I think. A rose.

20. Is there anything you are craving for now?
- Cheese. Lots of it *drools*

21. Where did your last hug take place?
- I forgot.

22. Do people ever make stupid mistakes when spelling or saying your name?
- Ms. Loy 'Gless'. Grrrayse. Okay? Grrrayse.

23. Do you drink tea?
- Of course.

24. When was the last time you saw a cop?
- I saw a police car the other night though. Does that count?

25. Do you wet the toothbrush before the toohpaste?
- Yes.

26. Does someone like you?
- I don't know. Do YOU? :D

27. What do you hope to accomplish before the year ends?
- Get used to where I'm studying at this year.

28. Tag 5 people:
- No
- No
- No
- No
- And no :)

Another day, another friend gone.

2008-01-05T02:47:00.000-08:00

Sarah Jane Eunice Chia Chen Nee,

What can I say about you? You've been one of my closest friends ever since Form 1. We've carpooled more than 100 times and have basically been to the same tuitions ever since I started Cikgu Hapizi's BM tuition class. This is supposed to be another dedication post, but I don't know where to start.
Well, you know this story already haha. The first time I saw you was in Form 1 and as I sat next to Belle, you kept staring and staring and staring. My first impression of you was 'Why the hell is this weird sepet girl staring at me?' I never knew until you told me that you wondered why I - who was a very frail and emo looking at that time - was good friends with Belle. Strange, isn't it haha. Well, ever since the very 1st time we met you (me and Belle), we've sort of contaminated your once innocent mind with lots of swearing lah, dissing lah etc. SORRY :( But heck, you wouldn't be the Sarah we know now if you didn't learn from those past mistakes, right? :) Oh and I still haven't thanked you for asking me and Belle to join Band in Form 1. If it wasn't for you, we'd be ex-PBSM members now haha.
When I take a moment to try to recall the past, we had so many great memories together. The sketch book (The spies haha), the Form 2 dance, the orange books, the gatherings we had at the beach and so on. Sometimes I wish we could go back to those times, you know? To relive everything :) Especially in moments like these.
I can't list out everything on a single post, but for all the times you've been there for me, for all the times you stuck up for me, for all the times you didn't get mad because I kept getting distracted by the TV when you're asking me for advice on the phone, for all the times you tolerated my strange mood swings and especially for all the times I copied off your homework, I'd just like to say thank you :) Thanks for always being supportive in all that I do, for always slapping (literally slapping haha) sense into me, for cheering me up when I needed it the most and for knowing when to leave me to my thoughts. You are the only one that knows me inside out and the first secondary school friend to see me cry haha. Thanks for being the perky mischievous 'little sister' I never had, for being the one to always liven up a dull conversation, for being the crazy daredevil that never fails to make us smile but most of all, for being our best friend :)

So thank you for all you've done for us and especially for being a part of a group with the strangest mix of personalities. Yet we all still managed to hang on till the end, right? Haha.

Gonna miss you loads, moi. Take care in KL and try not to get lost, okay? :D

May God Bless you always :)

Growing up bites.

2007-12-23T05:30:00.000-08:00

Tis' the season to be jolly fa la la la la la la la la~

Not! D:

Although the Christmas season is supposed to fill everyone's hearts with joy and oodles and oodles of happiness and fun, I certainly don't feel that way. Don't get me wrong. I love Christmas. I love that it's finally here, but unfortunately I'm just not in a festive mood :(

Why, you ask?

Well, it's approaching the end of 2007 and the beginning of 2008. While primary and secondary students worry about their new shoes and new uniforms and books, we, the ex form fivers are watching friends leave sweet ol' Miri to continue their studies elsewhere. *sigh* Sometimes, I wish I had to go back to St Joe again next year. No joke :( I miss St Joe. I miss hanging out at the canteen during break time and purposely staying there until the juniors had to shoo us away. I miss hanging out at the PA room with my buddies and just chatting away while everyone else is suffering listening to school rules (which, I might add is repeated almost every week) during the assembly. I miss just sitting around in class with my friends and BS the day away. There are just so many things I miss about school, about good ol' St Joe Miri.

Ms. Belinda Wong Tze Veun a.k.a Ms. Bofobleb is moving tomorrow D: No Belle! Don't gooooo :(

Belinda:
Ahh... it's been a long journey for you, hasn't it? :) I've known you since... Primary 5? Haha we had so many memories together. You were by far the friendliest person I've ever met in Primary school (because you invited me to your house for Chinese New Year and for projects and stuff ^^) and the most daring. You were always the reliable one, always finishing your project in time and offering to lend us a helping hand when doing group work (Yes, I know me and Sarah are lazy bums :( ). That's just your nature and that's what made you the Belinda we know and love today :) So Belle, for all the times we've hurt you and made you distant yourself from us, we're so sorry. Let's just erase those awful memories, alright? :) but Belle, we just want you to know that you will always be one of the best band presidents ever in the history of St Joe Miri Marching Band, the most garang prefect in our prefectorial board (it's a good thing!), the most cantik and fashionable girl in our group, the most in-your-face chick we've ever met but most of all, the greatest friend in the world :) Thank you for always being there for us, Belle. You are a true friend :) We'll miss you loads. Take care and don't forget to keep in touch with us :)

Back in the pinafore days. The HORROR! D:

Another tag.

2007-12-03T00:16:00.000-08:00

I was tagged by Kristine :(

5 THINGS FOUND IN MY BAG
- A pink mirror O.O
- Mascara.
- Earrings.
- Coins.
- Tissue.

5 THINGS FOUND IN MY WALLET
- Cards.
- Scapular.
- Money.
- Necklace chain.
- Part of a metal violin given to me by Chris (sorry dude :( ).

5 THINGS FOUND IN MY ROOM
- Closet. Pink *blech*
- Desk lamp.
- Loads of old books.
- Stuffed toys.
- Pink dressing table haha.

5 THINGS I’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO
- Get fatter :)
- Go skiing.
- Race with real cars :P (who am I kidding. I can't even drive yet haha)
- Meet Mayday Parade in person :)
- Take a Puak 13 pic (which has never EVER been done)

5 THINGS I’M CURRENTLY INTO
- Mayday Parade :)
- Whose Line Is It Anyway.
- Beaches :D
- Sleeping.
- Onlining.

5 BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE TO TAG
I'm a nice person. I don't tag people yerseh :P

Bye bye, St. Joe. You were good to me ;(

2007-11-26T06:55:00.000-08:00

"Watch it burn
Let it die
Cause we are finally free tonight" x]

Congrats to all SPM-ers for graduating Secondary School!

'Tis Mayday Parade :)

2007-11-12T05:17:00.000-08:00

I made this music player at MyFlashFetish.com.

Myflashfetish + Mayday Parade = <333

Tag.

2007-08-31T08:49:00.000-07:00

Darn tags.

1. Have you ever cursed someone aloud in front of them?
# Last time. Now rarely.

2. Who's the person who dominates your phone's inbox?
# No comment.

3. What do you feel when people compliment you?
# Flattered of course. I'd wear a smile the whole day =]

4. What would be your initial reaction if you saw your boyfriend/girlfriend kissing someone else?
# I'd cry ='( pathetic, no? haha.

5. What would you do if you saw someone being murdered inside their house?
# Call the police of course.

6. Tell one weird fact about yourself.
# I don't think I'm weird. I'm... unique =P

7. People often tell you that you like..
# certain 'people' haha. Colop!!

8. Could your life still be happy if you had to leave everything behind to go another place?
# I won't be happy if I had to leave my family and friends. So the answer's no.

9. What if some stranger just touched you in the ass?
# Regardless girl or guy, I'd whack them both. Extra power for the lesbo haha.

10. When you're irritated, you tend to..
# let out an 'urgh' and start to distant myself from whatever's irritating me.

11. Tell how was your last kiss was..
# No.

12. Have you and your mom had a big fight?
# Not really. When I was a kid got la. Spoilt ba =P

13. If you were obese, what's your first step in losing weight?
# Lose weight? I'd keep the weight bahaha.

14. Would you slap your best friends' back if they slapped you?
# Of course.

15. When you were little, what past time did you enjoy?
# I loved hanging out with my kiddie friends at the nearby playground =]

16. Is grade school better than highschool?
# Sort of. Grade school's easier =(

17. Would you ever marry someone who's black American?
# Why not?

18. Who's the most sensitive person you know?
# Ada la.

19. What's the best movie for you so far?
# LOTR trio. Hands down =]

20. Do you have a collection of some sort?
# Stamps and stickers. But I stopped collecting them when moved here.

21. Do you always get teased by the people around you?
# D-uh. It's like some kind of daily routine.

22. Ever got caught peeing in public?
# Of course not.

23. Thrown up in front of your crush?
# Nope.

24. What's something you're concerned about recently
# Loads of stuff.

25. Tag five people.
# No =]

A bond beyond ocean and sky ;]

2007-08-28T00:34:00.000-07:00

It's been a while.

A lot has happened in these few months and I'd like to post about something very meaningful to me =]

Let's start off with an incident that happened a few months back.

"No, I'm not performing." It used to be one of my most used phrases in the month of May and April. Lots of people would question me and I simply told them that my parents would not allow me to perform. I also had to consider my health which was deteriorating at that time due to certain reasons. At a certain moment, some of the members were begging some of the seniors to perform. With a band consisting of around 50% juniors, most of them in Form 1, how far can the band go, right? And these were the States, not some small concert. The instructor even tried to persuade the parents but to no avail. Only a few were convinced to perform while others stood their ground. It seemed like a wise thing to do at that time, just leaving the band without even considering my post. We even almost lost a friend that we never knew could be so close to us now because of this. And at that time, at that certain point in my life, I actually hated the band. I couldn't believe how much tension it caused me. I couldn't believe how many times it caused me and my parents to argue.
But when I got back a few weeks before the competition, the atmosphere was different. It felt awkward being there and when we took control of the formation just for a few minutes to help out, it was obvious. We weren't welcomed there anymore. It's wrong to assume without investigating beforehand but the signs were crystal clear. So we left with heavy hearts. Some of us started to question the behavior. "What happened to the unity? What happened to the respect?" We came to the conclusion that they couldn't wait to take over our post. Who could blame them? We left just like that. I would be pissed off too if I were them.
Everyone could tell there was tension between the seniors and some of the future leaders since the end of last year during the Hong Kong trip. It had only gotten worse after the States. The conflict lasted months and eventually the seniors decided to retire early. We got the candidates for the new board and were debating on who was to lead. It was hard for us even though it seemed like we didn't care anymore. But we did. After five long years in band it was hard to leave but we knew we had to. One day, Bel received an unexpected phone call from a band member. He was asking for help and said that the band was in shambles. When she heard this, she called the other seniors without hesitation. We all showed up the next day, anxious and worried about the band's condition.
He was right. Everything was a mess. The members were starting to rebel. They made the leaders look like lifeless dolls when trying to control them. No one was listening. No one was cooperating. It seemed like the band was going down so quickly after it's highest achievement last year in Hong Kong. You could just imagine how painful it felt to see something that we helped build for years to crash down right in front of our eyes. And we knew that without cooperation from both sides, there was no longer hope for the band. So we held a meeting. A serious meeting and hopefully the last meeting of its sort. Almost an hour of debating and discussion and we finally came to a conclusion:

[Pic not available yet]

We were taught since the beginning to be one big family. As juniors we were guided and taught by the seniors whom we respected and will never forget and as seniors we tried our best to teach the members all we know. Band has truly changed my life and has taken up a huge part of it as well. To all my friends and members, we've all been through thick and thin together and although conflicts may arise once in a while, we always find a way to bounce back. We grew closer through band and with band we have built a family of music loving, band crazed, sun-immune members together. Though band members may come and go, but the love for band will never die ;]

Josephians,
May you achieve more than we've ever dreamed of. To the summit, no? =]

St Joe Miri Rawks! Oh YeAh!!

No giving up now...

2007-06-05T10:39:00.000-07:00

So you found out today your life's not the same
Not quite as perfect as it was yesterday but
When you were just getting in the groove
Now you're faced with something new
And I know it hurts and I know you feel torn
But you never gave up this easily before
So why do you choose today to give it all away

Well it's not so bad y'all
Together we all fall
Just as long we get up we'll stand tall
We shouldn't waste another day
Thinking 'bout the things that we forgot to say

I'm hittin' back y'all
Kickin' these four walls
Just as hard as I can til I can't crawl
I won't waste another day
With all these silly things
Swimmin' in my brain

[Chorus]
There's no giving up now
Do you really want to give this all away
Can't you ever see things in a different way
Somedays
No giving up now
Such a beautiful thing to throw away
You should think things through
Over and over again
All over again

So your scars fade away
You soaked up the pain
A better person 'cause you lived through those days
And now you know what it's like to prove
You can overcome anything that gets to you
Well it's alright
We're sayin' our goodbyes
To the past and everything that ain't right
We won't waste another day
With all these silly things in our way

[Chorus]

I know we have given
All that we can give
When there's nothing to lean on
Well, I remember this
All we make of this lifetime
Is always here within
And remembering that's why
We should never give in

[Chorus]

There's no giving up now

'Tis a good song when you feel like crap or when your current life's gone bad. Really gives me that extra push to get through another day. Never give up if you truly treasure something, no matter how difficult life gets.

I just wanna get drunk and forget about everything.

2007-06-01T08:55:00.001-07:00

Coz' the one thing I loved so much is just not the same anymore.

Yeah I could be over exaggerating.

But one things for sure: They don't understand what we've been through. How we feel. How much we've sacrificed, though in their eyes it could never be enough.

What else can I do, right? I'm already not wanted there. I've been back stabbed. And I practically ruined everyone's mood just by showing up with the intention of helping out, not showing off. I've just been unofficially stripped off my post as a vice. But I don't really care about that.

What I really care about is my friends who are currently busting their ass day and night just to help them improve. And what do they get in return? They just get scolded, back stabbed. I know lah, we're not the best board ever. But give them a break, okay? They're trying. So damn hard. The least you all could do is co-operate just for a few more weeks. Is it really that hard? If there's anything, just confront us lah. How would we/they know if we've/they've done anything wrong if you don't say anything?

I just... I don' t know. It's not the same anymore.

What I ask of you all is simple.

Just co-operate with the remaining seniors.

Maybe I do seem like some kind of traitor for abandoning you all. But I really didn't have a choice. It's fine if I just seem pathetic in your eyes. It's not forgiveness that I seek from all of you.

I just want you to love band, together with the other remaining seniors.

Please don't make it hell for the others. Don't make the senior's last few weeks with you all be the worse they've ever experienced. They love the band, I can assure you. And so do we.

Unity is all that matters now.

So please. Stop all this.

And just help them out.

Please.

So...

2007-05-30T07:13:00.001-07:00

I don't feel like I'm of any use anymore. What's the use of caring if I don't even feel accepted? If I don't even get the same friendly looks I used to get when I was there a few weeks ago? If I don't feel like part of it anymore? If I just feel like some kind of bossy, noisy b*tch yang suka berlagak in front of people?

I guess this is somewhat like retribution.

Maybe I should learn to let go.

Maybe.

Just maybe.

Dewa 19- Pupus

2007-05-29T06:30:00.000-07:00

I love this song and it's lyrics :)

Indon songs beat Malaysian ones anyday.

Thanks for the intro, Pol!

Still under construction

2007-05-28T09:24:00.001-07:00

My blog isn't completely done yet. I still have a few editing to do and still have to learn how to make my very own custom blogskin.

So how are you? =3

It's been ages since I last blogged and believe me: these past few months have been so rocky I almost fell flat on my face. It's been a tough ride for me but I managed to pull through. There's been a lot of conflicts and a lot of problems lately. Mostly solved, but some are still left hanging. Let's just hope everything turns out well, ya?

Life's been boring. Especially the holidays.

It's been emptier lately. I feel like I'm missing something. And I know exactly what it is: Band. Circumstances caused me to step down from the performing list. I miss it a lot though *sigh*. This is probably retribution for all those mornings I woke up for band complaining that it was too early. Nowadays I wake up late and feel like nothing else can satisfy my boredom. I'd rather wake up at 5am for band practices than to wake up at 10am and do nothing. I miss you, band. But what goes around, comes around. Probably referring to those times when I sort of thought the management wasn't good enough. I guess I didn't know how it felt to be a leader. Now I bet I'm being criticized behind my back for not being there for the band! NoOOooOoOoo! *rips eyeballs out* Damn the bad karma =\

Besides that, our friendships had had it's share of bittersweet moments. Though most matters are settled, it can't remain calm forever. It's probably all those personality differences. Some are strong, some are weak. Some prefer to do this, some prefer to do that. So I'd just like to apologize if anyone was hurt in this 'argument'. Things have changed. People change. And only God knows how and why. Hopefully, it's for the best. But I still hope we'll all remain friends. Hug? :( *hugs*

I need to sleep now. It's close to 1am. Toodle boogle shmoogle!

2007-05-27T09:01:00.000-07:00

Blog is currently under construction.

So be back in a few days!

2007-05-27T08:35:00.000-07:00